He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize