thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Dual....:-)
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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