I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
