Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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