Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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