I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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