I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
