After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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