she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
