dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
