Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
