Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
