I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
