so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
