I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
