We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
