you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
