I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize