I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Randomize
