I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
she peed on how many people?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Randomize
