can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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