You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
