I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
