Swine flu. Run for my life!
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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