he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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