Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i will never coherently bang her
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Randomize
