I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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