Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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