Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Randomize
