you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
