I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
