So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
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