When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
