So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
