Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
