xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
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