Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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