do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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