I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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