Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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