We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
