theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
