May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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