why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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