How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I AM VODKA MAN
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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