I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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