Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
