I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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