Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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