shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
